Friday, February 10, 2012
A Bible Dropout
Confession time. I'm a Bible Reading Plan dropout. I've started and stopped so many different Bible reading plans that I've lost count. I always start strong with my Bible and my journal by my side. After a few weeks or months, life gets busy, I get behind, and eventually I give up.
I'm not proud of this. It's pretty embarrassing. I write inspirational fiction. I go to church every Sunday. Shouldn't I have enough discipline to read my Bible?
Recently, this all changed.
At the end of last year, I opened my Bible and read Genesis, Chapter 1. The next night I read Chapter 2, and I continued reading one chapter per night. Slowly, I began seeing the Bible, not as something on my to-do list, but as the story of how my God was saving His people. I write novels - so obviously stories speak to me. For the first time, I began seeing the beautiful, heart wrenching story of God's love for us in the pages of my Bible.
This time the habit stuck. Not only that, but it has been life changing for me. I truly believe I'll finish the Bible this year (probably sometime this summer), and when I'm finished, I'll start right back at Genesis. Not because it's a New Year's resolution or something on my list of things to do, but because I can't imagine my life without it.
That being said, it hasn't been easy. The Old Testament can be tedious, difficult to understand, and frustrating to read. Okay, that's an understatement. There are things in the Bible that have been just plain disturbing to me. God has done things that I don't understand. That fact used to frighten me...a lot. I'm learning to give those feelings and that confusion to God, and He's teaching me that I can't fit the Creator of the universe into the neat box I've tried to create for Him. Sometimes I can't explain His plans or His story, but our God is a big, awesome, powerful God. In the end, that's all I need to know.